Disappearing Act - A Personal Post

I took this picture several months ago. This television had been sitting on our street in front of someones house for months, and after time the weather and people took a toll on it. I really thought it was a beautiful picture of a thousand metaphors.

The metaphor most fitting today is a personal one:  "Beauty and potential broken down by time and elements." 

I feel like this television.

My "sister", Jessica made a keen observation recently.  She told me she can always tell when things are tough for me because I stop writing.  It hasn't ever been a conscious decision, which is why I never made that connection.  When the going gets tough, I get quiet.  I am a less present friend, I tend to keep people more at an arms length, and I feel uninspired to express my heart.  Add to that the nature of my husband's profession, and you can see why I simply cannot share things as much on a public forum.

What I can tell you is this: we are in a point of change, challenge and transition in a dozen arenas.  The economy is taking a toll on our little town, and I'm looking for a way to supplement our income.  I've found significant challenge in that.  My background is in real estate, and, well, real estate just isn't what it used to be.  My passion is writing and baking.  I have been thoroughly discouraged with an attempt to pursue writing, so baking is my next uncharted territory.  In the meantime we are selling things on Craig's List.  Things like furniture.  Things like my babies' crib.

It is just stuff.  It is just temporary.

Once I would lay in the grass, lost in the clouds and dreams of my future.  I saw glimpses of potential for greatness.  The clouds would move quickly, and hope glimmered in the sun rays.  Perhaps I can explain more in the future, but the clouds that have lingered have darkened that hope...that potential.  I know that I have accomplished much and have much to be thankful for.  I am simply in a challenging place.  I am looking forward to some cloud movement soon.

And so goes my disappearing act.  I have a dozen homemaking posts in the works, so bear with me.  As it goes, a disappearing act ends with a reappearing, does it not? 

"So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal." 2 Corinthians 4:18